Bring back the old Christmas

A Christmas tree

 It’s Christmas all around the world. Chorals commemorating this special day, at this time of the year, have already rented the air. The city dwellers are escaping the oppressive city life for the more laid back village one.

What’s strikingly absent, at least for me, is the absence of the Christmas cheer that marked much of my childhood back in the village. Mother would decorate the house and inscribe using colored clay MERRY CHRISTMAS.

Then there were meals. These meals were only made this time of the time. or at least the combination of the three. Rice, chapati, meat, and drinks. If father was present he’d slaughter a ram. If he was caught up with job commitment, we’d do with chicken (which was okay, although we wouldn’t have meat for a whole weak).

Of course there were clothes that had been bought in advance if luck was on your side that year. Every morning evening you paid homage to these brand new clothes, as if they were some sort of god. As a kid Christmas was some sort of a cult. We wouldn’t wait to wear the clothes which, unfortunately, was in fashion in the village – every kid had the same clothes.

On the appointed day, mother would split chores between us and we gladly undertook them. Every kid wanted to be pleasing. After all it is Jesus’ birthday. Usually, my role would to take of the animals. I would drive the cows to where they usually grazed, and later come and watch over sheep so that they don’t get lost. In December, there was nothing in people’s farms.

All the while, the smell of chapatti – the royal food at the time – would waft into the air from every homestead spreading forth the Christmas cheer. In our kitchen, mother would be busy making sure that we had this annual feast.

At lunch time or even an hour or more later (the delay was worthwhile), for this kind of meal took time to prepare, we scrubbed ourselves clean and donned our brand new clothes. Then the meal came and we ate gluttonly, as if we had never tasted food in a decade. A few hours later the effects of the meal would set in. Constipation.

That was the Christmas joy at its purest level, undefiled by perils of adulthood – bills and more bills. The joy is gone. The day is just like any other day in the calendar, and a day closer to paying a bill. The eerie sound of the token meter wakes one up in the middle of the night in its unique diabolic cheer. I am saying this because I detest capitalism.

During the festive season, every single brad attaches that red father Christmas’ hat on their brands, telling you that you need this or that for your day to be perfect. Everybody is trying to tell you that it would be less of fruitful day if you don’t have at least what they are selling. There are offers described – wait for it – as crazy. it is crazy because you don’t save anything, you spend.

Right now fares have doubled if not tripled. I can only empathise with the mama mbogas who’ve saved throughout the year for a chance to travel to shagz to see their people. She already sent the children to the village and remained behind to earn that extra coin, may be for that son or daughter joining form one next year. Because she hasn’t been to the village, even the day that her uncle was buried, she pays triple the amount. And  that’s precisely the reason am remaining behind in my ‘sheet hole’ praying that I meet Santa somewhere.

I’d ask him why Christmas is overrated. And if he is in a good mood, I will ask him for a bottle of whisky, and boiled meat, with pilipili hamsini, with plenty of soup the following day. Then I’ll pray for blessing for the following year and that the heavy burden of addictions and afflictions be lifted from the hearts of every man and woman whose strides shall be wide enough to leap into the new year.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS PEOPLE.

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Why corruption is not Kenya’s main problem, the source is

Every single day corruption cases emerging in Kenya

Every single day corruption cases emerging in Kenya [source/india.in]

We’ve been treated to some of the heinous corruption scandals lately, in what some section of right thinking Kenya’s term as part of jubilee government ‘unwritten’ manifesto. 

National Youth Service has twice hit the headlines, with billions of shillings lost. The first involved Ann Waiguru, and her scapegoat, a salonist. The second involved the Ngirita’s who found an ingenious way of supplying unpurified air.

READ ALSO: Kalonzo Musyoka Renounces Deal With President Uhuru

In recent news, a receptionist is wallowing in riches, taking 150,000 per hour chopper rides, and on a 150,000 shillings salary. Talk about a clever businessman and you will be automatically assumed to possess the same IQ as a tadpole. 

These are only a tip on the iceberg. National parastatal heads have been arrested and charged for various money-related crimes. And then there was Anglo-Leasing and Goldenberg. 

This raises a pertinent question: is corruption really a problem in Kenya? My answer would be an unequivocal no. And for these reasons. 

READ ALSO: Uhuru Offered Prime Job if He Endorses Raila in 2022

First of all, the people who are accused of these outrageous and utterly condemnable brazen thefts of public money come from our society. They were not born in Mars and dropped here by an alien spaceship. They are our brothers and sisters. And fathers and mothers. 

Secondly, when cornered, like leaders from Rift Valley, they are quick to retreat to a drab tirade, juvenile in nature, that their tribe is being targeted. It is as if they stole and redistributed to the whole community, which is something you can agree with if you belong to the thieves’inner circle. 

READ ALSO: Ruto allies blast ODM MPs for taking advantage of the handshake to undermine the DP

Thirdly, put a Kenyan in any position of power and he quickly begins scheming. The police, the kanjos, NTSA guys…they are everywhere harassing law-abiding Kenyans, who would do the same things if given the position of their harassers.  

It follows that corruption is an ingrained trait in our society. We have systemized it. It courses through our veins. Everyone with a chance to reap where he or she didn’t sow does it. 

As a result, we should rethink our moral values and changes Kenyans. I am not saying that everyone is corrupt; you can wait until you give that person a position. 

Corruption is a choice between right and wrong. It is a simple as that. Those who are corrupt have chosen to be wrong and to be wrong means being evil. You cannot still money meant for the sick and still be seen as good. You are satanic. 

Do you have a hot story you would like us to publish, please reach us through newsriftvalley@gmail.com or WhatsApp: 0723252294

How Kalenjins embody Julius Nyerere’s ‘ujamaa’ ideology

Kalenjin traditional huts [Source/tripadvisor.com]

Kalenjin traditional huts [Source/tripadvisor.com]

As a kid, nothing irked me more than seeing my mother share whatever we had with our neighbors. Worse still on Christmas. We’d slaughter a sheep, and she would give a neighbor who happened to pass by at that moment.

The culture of sharing is one of the things that keep the Kalenjins close-knit. Families that are not well off often receive help from others. It starts with the extended family, and then the neighbors. 

This kind of lifestyle is reminiscent of Julius Nyerere’s Ujamaa ideology, or African socialism. He emphasizes the need for everyone to reap, justly, from their labor.

Nyerere talks about poverty in Africa. He says that it is caused by uneven distribution of wealth, tracing this unevenness to capitalism.

READ ALSO: Raila’s Visit Snubbed By Kiambu Leaders

The African set up did not allow one to acquire wealth so that he or she can dominate others in society. Wealth belonged to the community. The land belonged to the community. People shared this land.

In the event of famine or drought, everyone was affected in the community. In the event of death or any calamity that made one unable to feed their family, one was always assured that his or her children would be taken care of by the community.

The coming of the colonialists introduced capitalism. The land that initially belonged to the community was demarcated and individualized. The idea of wealth at the expense of the community took root. It led to the inevitable – poverty and introduction of social classes.

Even though the hallmarks of capitalism are present nowadays, I find my mother, and indeed every other Kalenjin, sharing the epitome of African socialism.

The wealth one gathers still belongs to the community. A Kalenjin is obliged to share. Your brother’s children are your children. You are their father; therefore you are supposed to take care of them in the event their biological father is unable.

I find this gesture humbling. It eliminates the need of one going to streets when a family is unable to meet its needs. Orphaned children are brought by the extended family because they belong to the family.

Kalenjin socialism, if I may call it, is one of the things that make one forge an identity. Sharing the proceeds of this capitalistic world keeps us together.

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8 ways to improve your memory

Improve Your Memory

Improve Your Memory

The retention of information by the brain enables us to function in our day to day lives. Imagine if you always forgot where you kept your keys? A good memory helps us excel in exams.

Here are some of the ways to improve your memory.

Learn something new

The brain works the same way as a muscle. The more you use it the more it grows stronger. Learning something keeps the brain challenged. It also expands the brain capacity.

Do not turn to google right away

With technology, it is tempting to look something up right away. That inhibits your memory capability. Instead, try recalling before finally looking up on the net.

Keep yourself busy

When you keep a busy schedule your brain does not have time to idle. A busy schedule keeps you preoccupied which improves memory.

Sleep on a regular schedule

Try as much as possible to go to bed at the same time and wake at the same time every day. Do not disrupt your sleeping schedule. An irregular sleep-wake cycle inhibits memory.

Exercise

Regular exercise ensures blood flows well in the body. It also helps generate brain cells which are essential in memory improvement.

Socialize

By nature, human beings are social creatures. Your memory improves if you talk to someone, even if it lasts only ten minutes. A strong social circle is even better.

Drink water

The memory is made of mostly water. It acts as a shock absorber for the brain and the spinal cord. Water also helps brain cells utilize nutrients.

Enjoy nature

Nature plays an important role in memory improvement. A simple walk in the park helps compared to a walk in the city.

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Why maize farming offers a chance to redefine Kalenjin politics

The maize politics have began. A precedence setting meetingwas set by three rift valley legislators, Alfred Keter of Nandi Hills, Silas Tiren of Moiben and Joshua Kutuny of Cherangany.  The three are accusing powerful forces in Jubilee government over their reluctance to set things right for the maizefarmer.

The questions in people’s mind are: who is sabotaging the maize farmer? What is the interest of the three legislators? How will the maize politics shape the race to the 2022 politics?

 Many people have stepped out in the Kalenjin dominated social media forums to castigate the three legislators. The verdict among these people leans on William Ruto being the undisputed Kalenjin kingpin, and he should be supported by the community by all means.

Maize politics will be significant in the run up to the 2022 general elections, and it offers the farmers a chance to right the wrongs in the Kalenjin politics.

There’s no point in supporting a politician who is contributing to your downfall. Your children’s life is at stake – their education, food, and clothing.

As a result, maize farmers should come together and set things straight. The ultimatum should be: maize prices should be fixed in such a way that enables them to make profit. Imports should be stopped until all farmers sell their maize.

The talks of leaders sabotaging others ambition should be set aside and concerns of the farmer addressed. It makes no sense to sacrifice dreams of millions for one individual.

5 things you shouldn’t do even if your lady tells you to

Courtesy (Oprah.com)

Courtesy (Oprah.com)

Men have always assumed that women are complex, people you can’t ever understand. Sometimes, many times, they say what they don’t mean. And these times can prove to be fatal to a man, or the relationship. These words are:

Do whatever you like

It comes when you ask her for permission to do something as innocent as hanging out with your boys. She will oppose that by expressly telling you that you can do whatever you like. By any means, don’t ever do whatever you like, but whatever she likes, which is staying at surveillance distance.

Have fun

At no time does she mean that you can actually have fun. When she says this, wrap up whatever you are doing, buy some flowers and head home with immediate effect. She does not at all approve your rendezvous.

It’s okay with me

It’s never okay, not today, not when she is dead. It is an expression that says: what a stupid idea. A woman is supposed to argue with all her might, as if she doesn’t, she’s gonna drop dead from asphyxiation. If she surrenders quickly, there’s something cooking.  

She’s beautiful, take her number

She could be having a really beautiful friend, and in jest suggest that you take her number. To flow with the joke, you decide that it does no harm if you take it. You will have killed a friendship even if she’s the one who suggested.

She’s got a nice ass, doesn’t she?

You are in no way supposed to agree to that statement. According to relationship laws, you are supposed to act deaf. Talk about things like the weather, because if you answer yes, she will suddenly turn sore, and ask you: are you implying that you’ll leave me for a girl like her?

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‘Mzungu mwitu’ asks for ‘matako’ in US


Justin Bradford, aka mzungu mwitu

Justin Bradford, aka mzungu mwitu

He is known as mzungu mwitu, owing to his impeccable Swahili, as we have been accustomed to, for a while. 

Justin Bradford’s love for the Kenyan culture has seen him endearing to him. He is a YouTuber, where he largely talks in Swahili in his videos. One particular video that he shot was the how to cook ugali.  

READ ALSO: Subtle signs you need to marry

Bradford came to Kenya as a missionary and learned how to speak Swahili in less than a year. He is the unofficial ambassador of the Swahili language, in its attempts at conquering the world. 

In a video he recently shot, Bradford goes around American drive-through food outlets, where he orders food in Swahili. The results are quite comical since none of the attendants is able to get what the mzungu mwitu was saying. 

One incident in the seven-minute clip has Bradford asking for ‘mataco.’

“Ningependa kukula matako uko nayo?” Bradford hilariously asks [to save your time forward to 5.30 on the youtube clip] to an obscure person who does not get what he is saying.

When the attendant gets the drift, that he may have actually been asking for taco, he asks him whether he wants the big one or the small one. Bradford replies that he wants all of them, in Swahili.  

READ ALSO: Lies everyone experience when betting

Critics say that the mzungu is gaining undue attention and fame yet we Africans have been speaking the colonialist’s language for ages. Bradford has professed his love for our culture in many interviews he has conducted. 

Well, mzungu mwiitu is different. He came and learned our local language and is actively promoting it online. In due time, Swahili will go global. Beginning 2020 South Africa will introduce Swahili as an optional language

Watch the video below;

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